Hiiii. I’ve wanted a blog forever, and I’ve made them on and off, but I can’t seem to stick with it. So I’ve started this nice, clean, pretty one in the hope that maybe I don’t fuck it up. I’m almost 17, birthday’s in April, and I still can’t drive. I feel like that’s an important thing to know about a person: If they can’t they are either too young or too scared. It’s the latter for me. Maybe someday, but until the car I bought sits waiting, unused, in the garage. I don’t even know if it still runs. Could go either way.
I have this weird thing where I joke in totally inappropriate situations. Like, i’ll be at a funeral, sitting in silence and i’ll say something like “Wow, can you believe this guy? Sleeping at his own party!” and then everyone gets horribly offended and I spend all the rest of the day awkwardly hunched over the cheese cubes, trying to figure out a way to apologize without making my grandma cry again. I also use jokes to introduce myself. I’ve made a reputation with my terrible, terrible jokes. Maybe i’ll share some sometime.
I like writing, obviously, and telling stories. I like when stories throw you in the wrong direction and then there’s a big reveal. I like altrock and rap. I collect cassette tapes. I spend way too much time fake-interveiwing myself. I sing in the shower.
Anything other than that will just have to be a secret for now.
With Love, Essie Gerth
The Starbound Elephant 